Have a laugh on me

We're not all in the same boat, some of us struggle to even get in the boat!

Life is frustrating when you can’t stand slowness


I talk really fast. In fact I eat, drink, write and drive (not with kids on board) like someone possessed. 


I also have a dreadful habit of mumbling… yep kinda embarrassing but true. Since I was young I have been told to slow down in everything I do, by teachers, uni lecturers, my friends, newspaper editors etc.

And it’s not just how fast I speak, it’s like my mouth and body can’t keep up with what my brain wants to do, the result can be a train wreck.

And since I know shorthand I also find it BORING to write longhand, so when I do it looks like I’ve sneezed while doing it, and I’m sure my kids Pre-school teachers wonder how the hell I’ve ever been employed!

The upside is I can type as fast as someone speaks, not someone as fast as me, but the average person, and this comes in handy.

The downside is when I write blogs, emails etc I do them at such a fast pace I often leave words out, or have errors. (which have been pointed out to me, and quiet rightly so) 😉

This isn’t really acceptable in my profession and is quite embarrassing. However, It’s probably also great for people when they see mistakes in my writing and go to themselves ‘see she’s not that great at what she does after all’ – because hey let’s face it, there is a lot of tall poppy syndrome in this world.

(Secretly though, this afternoon I’m going to go through all of my posts with a fine-tooth comb and sub them all with a red pen).

In regards to speaking like an auctioneer, there are some advantages to it, like if I say something inappropriate the first time around I can edit my sentence when I’m inevitably asked to repeat it.


(such an uncanny resemblance here don’t you think?)

And often people feel silly asking you to repeat what you said, so they just smile and nod – okay so maybe this isn’t an advantage.

Regardless, I am making an attempt to hold my horses when I speak so that No.1 does the same. She gabbles like something I’ve never heard before and is so hard to understand at times – snap.

As for fast walking, I’ll never be able to stop that. It’s like I’m on a race track, I look a good 10 or more metres ahead of me and anticipate what my fellow pedestrians are about to do.

For example, old people won’t move from the path, window shoppers stop without warning and then there’s the people who think it’s okay to have a family reunion in the middle of the shopping centre.


When I’m by myself at the shops, about 7 times a year, I zoom in and out of foot traffic like footy player. People look at me and wonder what’s the hurry? And usually there is none, but slowness annoys the shit out of me.

Slowness in general bugs me, so you can imagine how frustrating my life is – especially with young children who take FOREVER to do anything.

But I cut them some slack, sometimes, and just bite my already battered tongue. My hubby usually bears the brutal of my impatient one liners.

I’m trying very hard to remember that my kids shouldn’t be hurried just because I have no patience for slow poaches  (and yes I know it’s slow poke but I prefer poach).



Author: Have A Laugh On Me

I'm a mum to three, write from home and I rarely cook, craft or clean but admire those who do. I try to live by the mantra that there's no point in worrying about something that might not happen! Be warned this is not a fluffy, sweet mummy blog, rather a place where you can cringe, laugh and be shocked at my brutally honest take on my life.

4 thoughts on “Life is frustrating when you can’t stand slowness

  1. Um….you talk as fast as no.3? Lmao just sayin!

  2. I just almost spat my bubbly!

  3. Don’t do that – it’s a total waste xx 🙂

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