Have a laugh on me

We're not all in the same boat, some of us struggle to even get in the boat!


48 Comments

I love capturing my three when they’re unaware – Wordless Wednesday

This had better not be another black jellybean!

This had better not be another black jellybean!

Wow, she's hot!!

Wow, she’s hot!!

These boys are driving me insane!

These boys are driving me insane!

I LOVE Wordless Wednesdays – thanks to these gorgeous hosts.

Trish @ My little Drummer Boys

My Little Drummer Boys

Ai Sakura at Sakura Haruka

Bree @ Twinkle in the eye


68 Comments

The day I nearly put my head in the oven just for some peace and quiet

So please raise your hand if you have ever wanted to put your head in the oven?

What? – no takers – really??

I always knew that I was one of a kind ;).

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Perhaps I should put this initial statement in context.

It was 5.15pm and I had been up since 5.15am with three sick and very attention-mad children.

Okay that description is putting it nicely – which is so unlike me – they were like sneaky hawks circling their weak prey – ME.

They were taking turns to torture me, repeating my name over and over, crying at me and begging for food – generally driving me bonkers.

My kids pretty much wrote the manual for witching hour.

Anyway, so I hadn’t cooked the Husband a proper meal in three days and so was cooking a roast dinner (pork – aka Babe).

It was even complete with home-made gravy – to give the impression that I was still a shit-hot housewife!

But as dinner time drew near the three sickies elevated themselves to levels of madness that I haven’t seen in ages.

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It’s been raining on and off for weeks here on the GC and I’ve been on the brink of insanity throughout it all.

But after having to care for three sick kidlets all day I was SPENT!

I even called the Husband on his way home to ask him to please stop at the bottle-O because it was an emergency!

He didn’t even ask why – and that’s just some of the reason why I will love him forever and look past the fact he can’t put toilet rolls in the bin.

Here is the Husband being a super dad!

Here is the Husband being a super dad!

But that is also why when my hard-working Husband arrived home, after 13 hours away from us (lucky bastard), I made sure his family were sitting at the dinner table trying to be civilised!

It didn’t last for long – but we tried to not annoy the shit out of him for the first 30 seconds 😉

And you know what? As soon as my gorgeous six-foot hunk walked in the door (yep I’m a total suck up) – I felt the weight on my shoulders instantly lighten.

My rock was home, he was here to help me.

No I'm not married to Thor - but what a hero and those arms - cha chinngggg

No I’m not married to Thor – but what a hero and those arms – cha chinngggg

The love of my life came through for me again.

If it wasn’t for him (and vodka) – and the fact that he puts up with me for who I am – then my life would be beyond shithouse!

It’s days like that when I recognise how hard it must be for those who parent alone.

Motherhood ain’t easy – but a trouble shared is a trouble halved.

How crazy is witching hour at your place?
Are you fortunate enough to have a partner in crime to help parent – or do you do it alone sometimes? (and have my UTMOST respect and admiration!)

It’s totally IBOT with the McAwesome Jess from Essentially Jess


31 Comments

I love being able to make my son happy by just being me.

Today I felt like I was REALLY wanted as a mumma.

To my middle born I was not just a cook, cleaner, nose and bum wiper, or someone who puts on shoes, knickers and fills up his water bottle.

He is sick, just a flu or cold, but he was desperate to snuggle with me, so we watched his dragon movie and his wee body fell into my bosom.

I felt so happy with my babe in arms.

I felt so happy with my babe in arms.

Mind you he’s always been a boob boy, he was the child that BF for the longest.

I’ve often joked to the Husband that he’ll marry someone with ample knockers just like his mumma!

But back to my serious point.

I loved being able to cuddle, hug and nurture my boy when he needed it the most.

As mums we are so used to doing the essential things for our kids – but it’s rare that we get the chance to indulge their needs, smooch them for hours and comfort their wee souls.

I feel privileged today – I am everything my son needs and more.

Can you remember the last time you sat down for 30 minutes with your child and did nothing?
A time when you were just two souls together? Didn’t it feel great?


52 Comments

On being told Gen Y are the shiz and are going to rule the world

So if you haven’t heard Generation Y is going to come of age and rule the world!

I’m a little miffed at this really – not being one of those born between 1981 and 1994.

I recently interviewed a senior consultant for a global recruitment company and she said Gen Y’ers are the duck’s nuts – well not in those exact words but you catch my drift.

She was saying this in the context of employment – not in regards to their music taste or sense of fashion.

<a href="http://www.mirror.co.uk" title="Image source" target="_blank">Image source</a>

I don’t want to see your crumpet Miley – put it away and get some longer shorts. Thanks Mirror for the cracker shot

Anyway my contact wasn’t speaking out of her ass – research has proven she is in fact right – Gen Y are kinda the shiz right now and supposedly employers would be MAD not to hire them!

This what she has to say about these young bucks!

1. They are by far the most educated and well-rounded generation in the workforce today.
(I agree with the well-rounded part – just sayin’ Gen Y’ers have always had fast-food outlets)

2. Gen Y’ers are a privileged lot who grew up with a sense of entitlement.
(Spoiled brats you mean)

3. They are smart and they know it.
(Smarty pants more like – and crack-flashing short ones at that)

4. Their confidence is often mistaken for cockiness, while their ideas and enthusiasm are seen as being anti-establishment or challenging the status quo.
(I can do cocky – okay that just sounds all sorts of wrong)

5. Technology plays such a big part in their lives but it means that they are dependent on technology.
(Umm dir aren’t we all now?)

6. The fact remains – Gen Y’ers are here to say and will rule the world.
(No shit – unless they all get infected by something that is spread by being addicted to smartphones)

<a href="http://www.socialnomics.net" title="Image source" target="_blank">Image source</a>

Seriously? Who are these people? Come on – tell me if you’re one : (image http://www.socialnomics.net)

7. Employers should not expect Gen Y hires to stay – its just too un-cool for them – plus they know they have bright prospects someplace else.
(I can’t even think of a cool retort for this – I’m so Gen X right now :()

8. Gen Y’ers have creativity and boundless energy and provide value for money for any organisation.
(Well if you consider getting energy from a green shiny tin or white powder – yes okay I’ve give you that one)

So congrats Gen Y – I’m not worthy – now get off your phone/computer and get back to work.

Are you Gen X, Y or Z, and do you agree with these generalisations?
Or have you employed a Gen Y’er? And would they be your first choice?


64 Comments

What goes on tour stays on tour – a trip to Far North Qld – Wordless Wednesday!

This is what I had to put up with all weekend

This is what I had to put up with all weekend

The beach we weren't allowed to swim in :(

The beach we weren’t allowed to swim in 😦

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A lovely bunch of coconuts!

A lovely bunch of coconuts!

At the Port Douglas markets!

At the Port Douglas markets!

Such a gorgeous locust, it was a little sick so my sister rescued it and put in the bushes, much to the amusement of many guests who look like they wouldn't go near a bug if they were paid to

Such a gorgeous locust, it was a little sick so my sister rescued it and put in the bushes, much to the amusement of many guests who look like they wouldn’t go near a bug if they were paid to

Hate to be in charge of cleaning this sucker!

Hate to be in charge of cleaning this sucker!

As the night wore on I got a little silly - hence this pose!

As the night wore on I got a little silly – hence this pose!

And a few hours later here I am - rocking this shot or what?

And a few hours later here I am – pure class right?

But I couldn't contain myself for too long!!!

Jumping for joy and trying not to fall backwards off the cliff!!!

I LOVED my time away but was so happy to see my three babies!

I have to mention that my lil’ sister forfeited her ticket to get me home on time to see my children.

As I arrived home on the train this is what I had waiting for me - tear jerker!

As I arrived home on the train this is what I had waiting for me – tearjerker or what?

She had to wait another 16 hours to get on a plane home and only just made it to work on time – but she knew how much I wanted to get back home to my darlings – WHAT A ROCK STAR!!

Now that is love 🙂

A Wordless Wednesday means nothing without linking with Trish @ My little Drummer Boys

My Little Drummer Boys

And the crafty Bree @ Twinkle in the eye

Last but no means least is the multi-talented Ai Sakura at Sakura Haruka


62 Comments

Flying can be fun, and not just for those in the Mile High Club!

Every time I go to the airport there’s a flame inside of me that ignites.

I’m taken back in time to years gone by when I travelled around the world, a little bit, and airports meant a new destination.

It also means a chance to imagine where everyone is going, what they’re doing and who will meet them at the other end.

Last week I flew with my lil’ sister to Cairns to meet our big sister and the three of us spent the weekend lounging in Port Douglas.

To break the ice before the flight we had a sneaky (bottle of) bubbly – not because I’m scared of flying, I love it, but because it was 12.30pm and I had no kids with me – totally a reason to drink plonk!

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Once we boarded we made quick work of our surroundings, took note of the exits, fascinating people on board and discussed if we could ask the attendant for more than one wine each when they trotted by with the cart.

Thankfully while we were waiting we found some eye candy on the screens – HELLO Bradley Cooper!

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We then passed time by reading magazines, so maybe you don’t know this about me but I can’t stand trashy mags – so I made my lil’ sis buy a women’s magazine or something.

It had some tips on snoring spouses, popcorn v’s chips (dir) and tips for those with bad bladders, being a calm mum, stinky breath and fat tummies (I knew there was a reason I bought it).

Am I looking calmer or what? Maybe it was the wine!

Am I looking calmer or what? Maybe it was the wine!


By the time the plane took off we were giggling gerts but not so much as you’d hate to be beside us.

We had a national basketball team travelling with us – they were hard to miss being so tall (okay we did notice them as we were people watching at the airport).

I tried not-so-sneakily to take a photo of a dude that was so tall his head touched the ‘roof’ of the cabin. Later on in the flight we met and talked with him – I but don’t want to reveal his details.

Totally looking at me - oops.

Totally looking at me – oops.

We soon became friendly with our air hostie and he gave us a free wine because it was my birthday – gotta loving flying with the big V!

He gave us cheek the entire flight and it was awesome – he even took photos and the woman behind us totally photo bombed our shot – LOVED IT.

Peace out - lucky mole had a spare seat beside her - no wonder she was so happy!

Peace out – lucky mole had a spare seat beside her – no wonder she was so happy!

So after we guzzled back our free vino we were looking for more (as you do) I mean it’s not often I can drink at 2pm right?

I can’t be sure if we waited til the hostie walked past us or if we buzzed, but we looked like this while we were waiting…

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But it wasn’t long until good old V airlines pulled through and we were back into the swing of things and were like this…

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I really don’t condone being a trash bag on a plane – but we weren’t loud, rude, obnoxious – we were happy sisters loving each others company and so excited about the prospect of seeing our big sister for a weekend of relaxation!

So we made it to Cairns with no dramas and with only one pit stop by me.

Our amazing hostie was so familiar with me that he leaned on the door so I couldn’t get out of the plane’s tiny toilet – bloody hilarious – and I didn’t even blink when I finally got out because I knew it was him – I just told him that I loved how much fun he’d made the flight for us!

Just arrived in Cairns

Just arrived in Cairns

Our gorgeous big sis was there waiting for us – we were happy campers with a little glow on!

I really have to say that having an awesome cabin crew can make a flight so much more pleasant – whether it’s short or long haul.

And I know it’s not a glamorous job, but if you’re in the sky you have to act like you’re amongst the clouds – if that’s not your style then stick to the ground.

Have you had an awful or awesome experience in the air (not just those who’ve joined the Mile High Club – I’ve tried to do it before but we were both too big for those teeny toilets.

Do you have a flying ritual? Something you do on EVERY flight?

Totally linking with the super awesome but totally younger than me (BOO HOO) Jess @ Essentially Jess for IBOT


37 Comments

Celebrating 100 posts on my birthday!

By the time you read this I’ll be on my way to a 48-hour, child-free holiday in Cairns/Port Douglas with my two sisters.

What’s the occasion you ask? Well today is my birthday (35) and my family know I need a break or else I’ll go completely bat shit madder than I already am.

I have another reason to be excited about today – this is my 100th blog post – in almost as many days.

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It might seem rather excessive – but for someone who loves to write and never shuts up, it’s actually quite understandable.

I really love the blog world and everyone in it, and I hope I’ve been able to make you laugh, nod in agreement or smile in one of the last 100 posts.

So here’s a bubbly on me!

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Please be comforted in the fact that as soon as I arrive at the airport I’m heading straight to the bar to have a drink, regardless of whether ‘it’s 5 o’ clock somewhere’ or not.

I have never been away from my three angels for longer than 24 hours and even then I was just a 30-minute drive from home.

But I have the Husband looking after them and my amazing parents to help him so he’ll probably have more a break that me!!!

To be honest – I’m in need of a break so much that I’m not even anxious about going away. I know I’ll miss kisses, cuddles, their cute voices and their laughs.

But I need this time away to be a better mum for them.

I need to appreciate what I have, to take a step back and realise how amazing my life is, because if I’m honest – at the moment I don’t feel any of these things.

Here’s a few things that are guaranteed to happen while ‘on tour’ with my sisters!

This is the last time we all went out together - at my hens night - back in 2007!!  Drunken pumpkins for shizzle

This is the last time we all went out together – at my hens night – back in 2007!! Drunken pumpkins for shizzle

1. Between the three of us we’ll take enough selfies to sink a ship.

2. We just might get arrested but if we do you’ll never know because “what goes on tour stays on tour”.

3. I’ll probably laugh so hard at some stage I might just wee myself. Come on give me a break, I have had 3 natural births in 3.5 years – it’s to be expected right???

4. If there’s food there, I will eat it, if there’s alcohol of any description I will snaffle it down like a hungry fox.

5. I’ll get four more hours of sleep every morning while I’m away – 9.30am so much nicer than 5.30am!

6. When I see people with kids I’ll be drawn to them, and I’ll over share by telling them that I have three kids and I’m on a break from them for the first time ever and I really miss them!

Happy Friday – flogging with Grace’s FYBF – see you next week 🙂



45 Comments

It’s time us mums got in the photo instead of always taking them – Wordless Wednesday

After a recent search of photos I realised that I was in NONE of them – and while it doesn’t really worry me – I know it will upset my kids in years to come. I know this because I’ve hardly seen any photos of my mum with us as kids and I wish there were HEAPS MORE!

So go on – get in the photo next time!

Maybe my kids won't be so proud of this one - but I never said I was a serious mumma!

Maybe my kids won’t be so proud of this one – but I never said I was a serious mumma!

Ahh the duck face - stunning isn't it!

Ahh the duck face – stunning isn’t it!

Here's a few of us tonight!

Here’s some I asked the Husband to take because I found none of all three with me!

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Here’s some we took at dinner the other night while waiting for the Husband to arrive home from work!

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Are you in enough photos? Will your children/family members be happy with the amount of photos they have with you in them?

I LOVE WORDLESS WEDNESDAYS!

Linking with Trish @ My little Drummer Boys for Wordless Wednesday, Ai Sakura at Sakura Haruka and Bree @ Twinkle in the Eye

Check these awesome women out, they might be just what you’re looking for 🙂

My Little Drummer Boys


65 Comments

Oh how the mighty have fallen into a life of no romance

Isn’t it funny how times have changed? Okay so maybe it’s more a little sad than funny but you catch my cliche.

Just imagine this – it’s 2005 and Valentine’s Day – I arrive home from work to find my bed laden in flower petals, a teddy bear, chocolates and a dozen red roses.

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This how I expect the 14th of February will occur this year:

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We are a family of five

But you know what? Despite the fact that I no longer have much romance in my life (BOO) or the rose trimmings on the bed – because No.3 will eat them all – I wouldn’t change it for all the boutique wine in the world, and that’s a big call coming from me.

You know why? Because I have my awesome soul mate to spend it with!

I reckon until you meet yours you think it’s a load of SHITE – but for those of you who are super lucky, like me, and have met your soul mate – well be BLOODY GRATEFUL!

Our wedding day was so much fun!

Our wedding day was so much fun!

I had met a few men who I considered to be ‘the one’ but things didn’t work out for various reasons and so I was kinda thinking I would have to ‘settle’ for someone who was on ‘the cusp of being the one’.

A friend told me she had met her true love and that when I did I would ‘just know’. I laughed it off – because I didn’t think it really existed.

Thankfully I was wrong and found that it was true some years later when I stumbled across mine when I was dragged out to a pub in Sydney to be a ‘wingman’.

As soon as I saw the Husband and our eyes met I felt like I was looking at life through rose-tinted glasses and even now I know that I can face anything with him by my side.

This is a feeling I wish for everyone – but especially my two gorgeous sisters – this is us – aren’t we ridiculously CUTE and rocking those bowl cuts with style!

kids

Then again, maybe we aren’t all destined to be with Mr Soul Mate.

Instead many of us are lucky enough to meet our Mr Perfect Right Now, Mr We Complement Each Other, Mr We Piss Each Other Off Less Than Anyone We’ve Ever Met or Mr We Should Be Together Because The Time is Right and We Love Each Other For Who We Are!

So this Valentine’s Day – whether you celebrate it or not – let’s enjoy how much we love our significant other for who they are and why we love them!

Because love is the only thing on this planet that we really can’t buy.

Are you a Valentine’s Day person or not? And do you believe there is just one person out there for us, or do you think timing plays a part in who we end up with?

This post was brought to you by me – listening to Grammy-award winning Goyte – Somebody That I used to Know – these guys ROCK!

Listen to this amazing song here

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Crack me up!

Crack me up!


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Linking with Jess – who is hitting the dirty thirties soon while I am about the start the second half of mine! @ Essentially Jess – VISIT HER!!


7 Comments

I’m not really that sweet but it seems someone disagrees

I don’t think I’d describe myself as a sweet person – adjectives that suit me more include loyal, honest, sarcastic, sensitive, dry witted and impatient.

However, maybe there’s a hint of sweetness in here somewhere because I have just been given a Super Sweet Blog Award.

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To be honest I really do adore these blogger-nominated awards because they can reveal so much about a person.

For example, the lovely lady who gave me this Rita @ The Crafty Expat actually practiced as a criminal lawyer in Canada for four years before she moved to Oz.

I hope this never comes in useful for anyone but you never know 😉

It’s also nice to have someone say something nice about you – especially when all I’m getting from my wee peeps these days is attitude.

Like last night when I kissed my son at night and told him I loved him he said I had bad breath and I had to brush my teeth, he then added that I needed to get ride of the ‘spikes’ under my arms and make sure they ‘never came back’!

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So anyway the rules for the Super Sweet Blog Award are:

Thank the blogger who gave you the award and link back to her/his blog.
Nominate another blog or blogs for this award and let them know.
Post the award on your blog and answer five questions.

And the questions are:

1. Cookies or Cake?

I actually love eating cookie dough and have been known to whip up a batch of choc chip biscuits just to eat the batter – YUMMO!
Then again I can smash back cake like there’s no tomorrow, even a simple sponge with real cream and jam inside.

2. Chocolate or Vanilla?

Definitely chocolate, but I prefer it with nuts – almond, hazelnut, cashew, macadamia.

3. Favourite sweet treat?

Cheesecake mousse lattice slice choc eclairs not fussy will eat all sweet things except anything mint or coffee flavoured (I thought if I didn’t put in commas it wouldn’t look like I was cheating by picking just one favourite).

4. When do you crave sweet things the most?

All the time, in fact right now I want to dive nude in to a bowl of chocolate mousse, I live my whole life trying holding myself back from eating scrumptious food 24/7. Well except the past year when I ate whatever I wanted, hence the 10-15kg weight gain.

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5. If you had a sweet nickname, what would it be?

I’m not really a sweet person so it just doesn’t seem right for me to have a sweet nickname – but I’ll play, what about Lolly Lips?

A few of my nicknames have included Em, Ems, Emmy, Em Pem Stem, Tox, Toxy, Toxic, Foxy Toxy, Poxy Toxy.

The person I want to give the Super Sweet Blog Award is Me over at My Inspirational Journey (and no I’m not being smart, that is what this blogger calls herself :).

I really love her honesty and that she is a glass half full person! She also gives me lots of nice advice from a mum that has been there and done that.

Before I go – what are three words you would use to describe yourself? Is sweet one of them??


35 Comments

Downton Abbey has given me something to be thankful for

As I’ve spent the past three days battling a tummy bug/fever I’ve come to realise how lucky we are to live in an age of modern medicine.

Women very rarely die in child birth, and staph infections can be fixed with antibiotics.

I’ve just started watching Downton Abbey Season 3 – a scandalous period drama set in 1910-20s – and there’s been quite a bit of tragedy occurring (and lots of PMS crying on my behalf).

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It’s made me thankful for so many things, here’s a few of them:

1. That I wasn’t living in the 1920s because no man would want a woman with an outspoken mouth like mine.

2. I don’t have to get changed 5 times a day and before each meal, and that I can stay in my PJs all day without one of my maids worrying about me.

3. That I get to vote (well in NZ but not here – but that’s another story), can drive, wear pant and short shorts, visit and speak to who I want, and have a say over who I marry.

4. That I won’t ever be forced to give up my son because the only way I could afford to feed him was to become a prostitute.

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5. The class system is almost gone, well sort of, there’s still people that think they are better than everyone else and sadly those who judge based on skin colour. This is something I hope will be non-existent when my children are grown ups.

I love the scandal in this drama, it’s quite different from my usual shows, eg Dexter, Revenge, Fringe, Big Bang Theory, Breaking Bad, but I love Downton because it reflects how life used to be for some of my ancestors and I love learning about history.

A short and sweet post – not like me 😉

Linking with Leigh at Six by the Bay for Thankful Thursday – and Blogs and PR for Talk to us Thursday


Six By The Bay

Blogs and PR


40 Comments

The most hectic and dangerous pantry you’ll probably ever see – Wordless Wednesday

Who on earth would have a pantry that looks like this schmoozle? (me)

Who on earth would have a pantry that looks like this schmoozle? (me)

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Be truthful have you ever seen a pantry as messy as this?? See I wasn’t joking when I told you all my life was a bit disorganised.

Thank goodness it’s Wednesday – Hump day!

I’m linking with Trish @ My little Drummer Boys for Wordless Wednesday

Ai Sakura at Sakura Haruka!

Bree @ Twinkle in the Eye

Check these awesome women out, they might be just what you’re looking for 🙂

My Little Drummer Boys


58 Comments

What do you skimp on?

I wouldn’t consider myself a tight arse, mean or overly frugal with money – but I am sometimes stingy on what I will and won’t spend our hard-earned dollars on.

When the Husband and I were DINKS, double-income no-kids, we had plenty of disposable income and had we decided not to have children we would have paid off our average-sized mortgage in seven years.

Now we have three kids and our income has been almost halved, at this rate it’s going to take about 25 years to pay the sucker off and we’ll be in our 70s – 😦

Old Couple

I’ve been known to visit three different supermarkets to get certain products on special, these shops are all in the one shopping centre so it’s not as crazy as it sounds.

Let’s call them Moles, Saudi and Pull-a-hearse.

If I can save a few dollars here and there it means I don’t have to feel so guilty about lining the pockets of Mr Murphy, Mr Choice and Mr BWS.

Here’s a few things I now skimp on in an attempt to save some moolah:

1. Dishwasher tablets
Our machine was the cheapest and crappiest one around when we bought it some 7 years agos and I want it to hurry and knell over. Until it does I won’t be feeding it three-course, multi-coloured tablets with a flash ball. It gets a plain Jane blue ones that are one-third of the price, and deep down I’m hoping this will aid in its demise (sorry Husband).

2. G-bangers and gruts!
I used to splash out and buy fancy pants but nowadays if I can get 3 for $3 it’s a bonus. I’ve got some ‘nice’ knickers from yesteryear for when the occasion arises, pun intended.

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3. Clothes
I can’t remember the last time I paid more than $19 for a shirt/singlet for myself, I baulked at spending $39 on shorts a while back – just last week I got 3 for $28. Gone are the days when I spend upwards of $90 on a work shirt or skirt.

What I refuse to skimp on:

1. Toilet paper
I only buy Quilton- 3 ply – not just because the paper core tells me ‘Quilton loves your bum’ but because there’s nothing worse than thin bog paper.

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2. Insurance
It’s a smart persons way to make sure their investments are safe.

3. Kids shoes
I’ve always splashed out on shoes for kids because their little bones should be well supported, this is the same for school shoes that are worn 8 hours a day.

4. Certain foods/beverages
Eggs have to be free range, baked beans gotta be SFC, coffee will never be Blend 22, wine won’t be clearskin and tomato sauce won’t be homebrand.

The Husband always says “buy once cry once” – he’s a wise man!

What do you refuse to skimp on??

Linking up with Jess @ Essentially Jess for IBOT (hope you get you iPhone 5 girl – they rock)


33 Comments

Trying to turn around my shitty day with a post about gorgeous men and taboo topics

You know those horrific days when you wonder how the hell you got to this point?

When you spend all day battling a toddler who is harder to please than your old-school newspaper editor who smoked a pack a day and glared over your shoulder and breathed on your neck as you typed.

Today is one of those.

My youngest child is a screecher, and not your garden variety, but your death metal band screecher.

In fact when he’s at full throttle dogs from at least 1km away start barking, I shit you not.

My little screecher feature, as I affectionately call him, is just 16 months going on three.

I get about 15 of these a day, when he doesn't get his way, usually they are accompanied by head banging on tiles or whatever surface he has throw himself on.

I get about 15 of these tantrums a day when he doesn’t get his way, usually they are accompanied by head banging on tiles or whatever surface he has throw himself on.

Every day I battle to not lose my shit at him – most days I fail and I end up running to the other end of the house to hide from him in Get Smart style, closing doors behind me as I flee.

Or at my worst I scream back at him and then feel like a total cow because he’s just tired and can’t tell me what he wants or why he’s upset.

As a blogger who says it like it is, warts and all, there isn’t much I wouldn’t write about, especially the fact that I yell at a 16-month-old – MOTHER OF THE YEAR!

But in the interests of playing nicely, and that fact I really dig her blog, I’m joining in with Kirsty’s @ My Home Truths for I Must Confess

The theme is ‘taboo topics I won’t tackle’.

The problem is that I will pretty much say and write about anything, but will apply sensitivity and tact if needs be.

So I’m bending the rules slightly and listing topics that I know would really anger or upset some people off if I wrote about:

1. My views on religion and wars across the centuries.
2. Why I think some people shouldn’t be allowed to have children.
3. When people who have dogs directly compare it to having kids – apples and pears people.
4. That I’m sick of parents who ignore their kids at parks, playgrounds, parties etc, and then get the shits with you when you tell their lil’ devil off for pushing your toddler in the dirt and then jumping on him.
5. People who tell me I’m SO LUCKY to have three children – I know I am – I’m not a complete f*&K head – but don’t say it to me when I’m knee-high in shit, tantrums, washing, screeching and work.

Something I know that won’t annoy most bloggers (well perhaps apart from Kev @ The Illiterate Infant) is writing about spunky men.

I figure it’s okay to look at the menu as long as I don’t select – although I reckon I’ve got a bloody good chance of getting lucky with the man in the last photo.

In keeping with Deb’s @ Home Life Simplified Listmania here’s the scoop I who I crush on.

The dudes I used to get all hot and bothered about as a teen were Johnny Depp from 21 Jump Street, Luke Perry from 90210, River Phoenix from Stand By Me, and Keanu Reeves from Point Break.

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Old school Johnny – but I still adore him now!

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River being a cool dude.

If you haven’t noticed I like bad boys, I always have, which is why I spent most of my 20s with a broken heart.

But here are some more of my recent crushes:

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Bradley Cooper for his come f@*k me eyes and awesomely unshaven face.

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Jack Hughman, as I like to call him, is totally HAWT.

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George Clooney – I’m partial to a bit of salt n’ pepper!

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The Husband – my very own Mr Clooney – who I think is a total spunk and everyday I am grateful to have bagged such a gorgeous man, inside and out.

So there you have it, what I shouldn’t blog about but probably will, and a list of peeps I crush on!

If you haven’t already, link up with Kirsty for I Must Confess

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And Deb for Listmania

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Not to mention the lovely Alicia @ One Mother Hen

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Carving out a new identity for myself and knowing it won’t include a drunken 3-day music festival

There are a few things that I know I’ll never tire of and that’s live music and music festivals.

Since as long as I can remember I’ve listened to music, the radio, cassette tapes on Walkman, CDs on my Discman and small discs on my MP3 player.

I’ve also enjoyed dozens of live concerts and music festivals where I’ve always make my way to the moosh pit – usually alone.

However, I also love to listen and reflect on life with sad, sleepy music such as Enya, David Gray, Cranberries, and Dildo, I mean Dido.

But as I near middle-age (holy crap is that really happening to me) I am starting to realise that heaps of the cool shit I did when I was young was centred around music (okay and booze).

Like when I was 20 and a nanny in New York and travelled with friends to Rome (in NY) to camp out for the 30th anniversary of Woodstock!

Sorry T for including you in this pic! But wanted to show the pano view x

Sorry T for including you in this pic! But wanted to show the pano view x

A selfie back when there were no digital cameras and we just took photos and got excited when they were developed!

A selfie back when there were no digital cameras and we just took photos and got excited when they were developed!

As you can imagine it was a mad, mad time but I got to see some of my favourite bands live and I also learned how to wee standing up – bonus.

The playlist was amazing, all the biggies in one place – Coldplay, Sheryl Crow (remember her?) Red Hot Chillies, Metallica, Fat Boy Slim…

I also saw U2 and Madonna at Madison Square Garden arena during my years in the Big Apple – talk about once in a lifetime kinda of stuff.

As you can imagine having three children has kind of put a damper on being a concert/festival goer!

Although in 2011 my hubby and I planned to have our yearly outing at the Big Day Out – we were going to get all sorts of messy, just like the good old days.

But two weeks before the festival I found out I was preggars! SURPRISE!

We still went but the Husband was the only one consuming booze, wanker.

A totally sober me - strange but true

A totally sober me – strange but true

There are so many things you give up when you become the guardian to another soul, but the kickbacks are worth it (sometimes).

We all used to be and do so much before kids, and when we’re knee-high in shit and screaming toddlers our old lives seem so far away.

Since I began looking through old photos I’ve kind of being going through a mini identity crisis.

Like many mums with multiple children I feel like I no longer really have a voice, or am a person in my own right.

I am something to everyone else, a mumma, bum wiper, less than average cook, shoe fitter, laundry lady, prison warden officer for naughty children, wife, freelance writer, cranky daughter – the list goes on.

And while these titles help define what I do, they don’t accurately reflect who I feel I am.

But maybe I have to weave all of these roles together and become a new person – an improved model of my former self.

Although I gotta tell you I’d love to go back to Woodstock and spend three days camping, listening to amazing music and drinking beer instead of water because it was the same price.

It was also fun being in a perpetual state of drunkenness for days.

But in the words of Mick Jagger, you can’t always get what you want!

Have you managed to carve out a new identity that includes part of your old self?
Or do I just have to leave my memories where they are and grow up?

This Friday I’m again linking with some awesome peeps!

Grace for FYBF


Miss Cinders for Things I know

Things I Know

Cathy for Flashback Friday

And Bree for Flash Blog Friday

Talk about spreading the love – thanks girls you rock 🙂