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Carving out a new identity for myself and knowing it won’t include a drunken 3-day music festival


There are a few things that I know I’ll never tire of and that’s live music and music festivals.

Since as long as I can remember I’ve listened to music, the radio, cassette tapes on Walkman, CDs on my Discman and small discs on my MP3 player.

I’ve also enjoyed dozens of live concerts and music festivals where I’ve always make my way to the moosh pit – usually alone.

However, I also love to listen and reflect on life with sad, sleepy music such as Enya, David Gray, Cranberries, and Dildo, I mean Dido.

But as I near middle-age (holy crap is that really happening to me) I am starting to realise that heaps of the cool shit I did when I was young was centred around music (okay and booze).

Like when I was 20 and a nanny in New York and travelled with friends to Rome (in NY) to camp out for the 30th anniversary of Woodstock!

Sorry T for including you in this pic! But wanted to show the pano view x

Sorry T for including you in this pic! But wanted to show the pano view x

A selfie back when there were no digital cameras and we just took photos and got excited when they were developed!

A selfie back when there were no digital cameras and we just took photos and got excited when they were developed!

As you can imagine it was a mad, mad time but I got to see some of my favourite bands live and I also learned how to wee standing up – bonus.

The playlist was amazing, all the biggies in one place – Coldplay, Sheryl Crow (remember her?) Red Hot Chillies, Metallica, Fat Boy Slim…

I also saw U2 and Madonna at Madison Square Garden arena during my years in the Big Apple – talk about once in a lifetime kinda of stuff.

As you can imagine having three children has kind of put a damper on being a concert/festival goer!

Although in 2011 my hubby and I planned to have our yearly outing at the Big Day Out – we were going to get all sorts of messy, just like the good old days.

But two weeks before the festival I found out I was preggars! SURPRISE!

We still went but the Husband was the only one consuming booze, wanker.

A totally sober me - strange but true

A totally sober me – strange but true

There are so many things you give up when you become the guardian to another soul, but the kickbacks are worth it (sometimes).

We all used to be and do so much before kids, and when we’re knee-high in shit and screaming toddlers our old lives seem so far away.

Since I began looking through old photos I’ve kind of being going through a mini identity crisis.

Like many mums with multiple children I feel like I no longer really have a voice, or am a person in my own right.

I am something to everyone else, a mumma, bum wiper, less than average cook, shoe fitter, laundry lady, prison warden officer for naughty children, wife, freelance writer, cranky daughter – the list goes on.

And while these titles help define what I do, they don’t accurately reflect who I feel I am.

But maybe I have to weave all of these roles together and become a new person – an improved model of my former self.

Although I gotta tell you I’d love to go back to Woodstock and spend three days camping, listening to amazing music and drinking beer instead of water because it was the same price.

It was also fun being in a perpetual state of drunkenness for days.

But in the words of Mick Jagger, you can’t always get what you want!

Have you managed to carve out a new identity that includes part of your old self?
Or do I just have to leave my memories where they are and grow up?

This Friday I’m again linking with some awesome peeps!

Grace for FYBF

Miss Cinders for Things I know

Things I Know

Cathy for Flashback Friday

And Bree for Flash Blog Friday

Talk about spreading the love – thanks girls you rock πŸ™‚

36 thoughts on “Carving out a new identity for myself and knowing it won’t include a drunken 3-day music festival

  1. Great post. Fining my inner gig pig these last few years has been BRILLIANT! Lots of small shows where you see some great bands and say hello after. We met Evan Dando from The Lemonheads just before Christmas, so exciting. Music has always been a big deal in our house too. Just last night I had to beg Hubby to turn it off when Mister 4 went to sleep, lol. You have seen some great bands, btw.

  2. I hear you! In fact (if I’m honest) I squandered too much of my youth being responsible – no three day music festivals for me. Until now. Last year my husband and I went to two! We enjoyed the first so much, we booked a second. We called each other by our first names (not mummy and daddy) and remembered why we fell in love in the first place – we really enjoy each other’s company. Don’t dismiss the post-child three day drunken music festival – they’re sanity savers!

  3. I really identified with this post! I used to, and still do love seeing live music. Back in the day I was always up the front in various pubs around Sydney watching Cold Chisel and idolising Jimmy Barnes as he poured his lungs into the microphone! Now he looks so much older!! What does that say about me?? Still love the National Folk Festival here in Canberra at Easter… a lot tamer but I can reconnect a little with the younger, ragier me. U2 @ Madison Square Gardens – I’m jealous!

  4. I know that I have had one very deprived life!!
    I know I have done nothing anywhere near as fun as you in my life !!

    Great post!! And they are great memories you have!

  5. When I was growing up we never went to many concerts – mainly because there were none !!! But as the political situation in our country changed, music acts started to arrive and we went. These are some that I can remember – UB40, Tina Turner, REM, Bryan Adams, Simply Red, Indecent Obsession (when I was 8 mths pregnant) – since we have been here we have seen Pink, Keith Urban (twice), Rob Thomas (twice), Enrique Igelsias, Delta (twice) – some are such great performers and provide a time to really lose yourself.
    I have found that as K got older, I started to be more of myself (only older) again – I started to take more interest in myself and to reconnect with the person that I wanted to be – not just a wife, mom, daughter, work colleague – but ME !
    Have the best day and I hope you find yourself – it isn’t about growing up – it’s about being who you are.

  6. Great post – had to laugh at the pre-digital camera days! I didn’t attend many outdoor music festivals when younger but I’ve discovered them in my old age. So every now and then we go to the Hunter Valley to see an old crooner strut their stuff…and of course, drink wine. I’m not a drinker – except when I’m in the Hunter (no children, no need to be the designated driver).
    p.s. Thank you for linking back to my page but you forgot to put your link in my linky thing (if I’m making any sense)!

  7. When I’ve had wee kids at home and been tied, tied, tied down, I have LONGED to be young again. I used to dream of being back at Uni.

    Oh happy memories!!

    Not so bad for me as all kids at schooland there is quite a bit of freedom of choice (9am – 3pm !!)

    I have very intention of going back to do it all again when the kids leave home. It’s gonna be like being back at uni but with more money and less drunken sex – hopefully.

  8. Oh what I’d give to go back to the early days for a day or two! I would do so much stuff I wish I had done! But still the stuff I’ve already done too!

    I loved seeing live music, although I didn’t see as many as you have! My fave was The Angels – original lineup – best night I ever had!

    Reinventing? No I think “growing”. Where you came from makes you who you are. You can add to it πŸ™‚

    I can’t wait until my kids move out – I know, horrible mother I am lol

    Thanks for linking up to TIK! Hope your weekend is fabulous!

    MC x

  9. What amazing memories you must have to reflect back on Em πŸ™‚
    Love the selfie, I remember holding out to have the camera roll developed, the anticipation is something our children will never experience!
    Great post x

  10. I think we all loose sight of who we are when we become a wife and mother. But don’t worry we eventually do find our way back. Well almost.

  11. Such a timely post for me! In the past two weeks I’ve seen the first *grown-ups* movie since having the kids…over EIGHT years ago..and we went to see Keith Urban in Brissy!! MY GOD I love live music. And I just discovered that Hubba doesn’t so much…bummer…

  12. I love music! In fact, as a part of the midlife crisis I am currently having, I bought myself a pair of Beats by Dr Dre Headphones (cheaper than a sports car). They have an awesome noise cancelling capacity which has saved my sanity during the school holidays πŸ™‚ So in answer to your question….I don’t think you need to grow up at all (My husband told me Beats were for teenagers)….the trick is incorporating who you are and what you WANT to do into what you HAVE to do. (Let me know if you successfully do this because I totally suck at it!!)

  13. I’m a firm believer in selling what I like, and my interests to the kids – so we go and watch the sports I like to watch together, and my eldest and I like a lot of the same music so we’ve started to go to bands together (when an all ages gig). There are certain limitations (need to stand up the back for safety, no drinking etc) but nice also to start relating on the same level.
    Partner and I have different tastes in music but when there’s a crossover, we’ll get a sitter and go together – I think some things are worth spending the money on because you can forget what it’s like to be you as a couple. But add a sitter into the mix and it’s BIG bucks!!

    • I can just imagine the cost of a big night out, but I bet it’s worth it. One day I hope to find out! And good on you for doing bands sports as a family – I look forward to that as they kids grow. Thanks for visiting and commenting Lydia πŸ™‚

  14. Hello party girl πŸ™‚
    Fun post!
    Hey, you won the Deep Fried Olay give-away! Woot woot. I can’t find your email contacts on your blog anywhere. Can you email me your postal address and Olay will send your prize out directly.
    My email is leanne@leanneshealangdown.com
    Happy Saturday!
    Leanne @ Deep Fried Fruit

  15. Congratulations – I just nominated you for a Leibster Award http://marleisa.com/

  16. I felt I had to re-create a whole new identity for myself since I came to Australia… Speaking a different language, turning the page on being a lawyer, finding what I want to do now… But life is full of change and change can only be good I think even though very challenging…
    I love your picture on your header by the way!

  17. Wow! Some great concerts there!
    I’m still trying to find that balance between the old crazy, disco dancing me and the new mummy me. It might take a bit more time to find a comfortable in between, me thinks.
    On a completely separate note, man, you’ve got a massive tongue! πŸ™‚

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