Without sounding paranoid, I think my boys are secretly plotting to f#*k me up.
They have reached new heights in driving me ‘bat-shit mental’ and now verging on sending me ‘I really should trim those hairs on the palms of my hands’ crazy.
Don’t be fooled by their innocent-looking faces – they have recently written a new chapter in the boisterous boys book.
Nothing stops them from doing what they shouldn’t be doing, running on couches, hurling themselves on the couches, opening the fridge and pulling everything out, turning on and off the air conditioning, getting food out of the pantry.
They truly just stare at me, laughing, as if almost daring me to tell them off or put them in the naughty corner again.
Oh sorry, did I mention they are just 3 and 1.5 years?
Honestly, I’ve no idea how to move forward from this, and embarrassingly, I think they are out of control.
And I’m not going to even weigh-in on the whole ‘give them a wee smack on the bottom that will sort them out’ debate.
It doesn’t work folks – kids will still be little shits – and teaching them it’s okay to hit someone else really isn’t the way to improve their behaviour.
Here’s a few things I know my boys do that make me want to go out to the shop, buy some cigarettes and never return. (and no I don’t smoke, but that’s the stereotypical thing people say when they talk about mums who escape desert their families).
1. They are always on the scrounge for food, so pantry/fridge gets opened 85 times a day.
2. Leaping across the couch, which freaks me out as No.3 already cut open his eye doing this a few weeks ago.
3. Crying, screaming, screeching when they don’t get want they want, which is pretty much ALL the time!
4. Waking up at 4.30am and not going back to sleep.
5. Going into the shower and trying to eat the body wash/shampoo and then pumping it all over the house – note – this is only the 1.5 year old.
Now I know they’re only little but damn they can get inside my skin like nothing ever has before.
Leaving the room doesn’t help, they seriously follow me around like flies to a cow’s bum.
Counting to 10 also doesn’t ease my blood pressure, I haven’t got the patience to meditate and while it’s tempting, I can’t start drink during the day.
What’s a girl to do?? Seriously peeps words of wisdom gratefully received!
This Good Friday I’m linking with
Miss Cinders @ Saturday Morning Orge Mum for Things I know
Grace @ With Some Grace for FYBF
Cathy @ The Camera Chronicles for Flashback Friday
And Bree for Flash Blog Friday